I remember watching When Harry Met Sally and being horrified at one scene. Absolutely horrified.
No, not that scene. This one.
I decided that I was not going to be high-maintenance. Ever.
Or at least not on a regular basis.
But now I am! And I hate it.
This is the way I have to order at our favorite Mexican restaurant: "I would like the Juarez Combo but I want the chicken taco to be in a soft corn tortilla, I want the cheese enchilada to be a chicken enchilada with no sauce, I want the tostada to not have any meat sauce or cheese and the beans to have no cheese on them."
The only thing on my plate that is not changed is the rice.
Needless to say, we are pretty memorable to the waitstaff which is why we try to get our usual waiter (honestly, if our usual waiter isn't there, I get fajitas because the only thing to change then is the tortillas).
Lest you think I only inconvenience others, I have to confess that I also have had to go shampoo free.
No, I do wash my hair but it is with either castille soap or homemade shampoo (made with castille soap). I would much rather that my hair smell of vanilla or flowers but I get tea tree oil or peppermint. sigh.
For the past several years (10 or more) I have had to use dandruff shampoo in the winter because my scalp would get dry and itchy. In the summer I could use whichever one I liked without a problem, but each winter it was back to dandruff shampoos.
A little over a year ago, my scalp problems got much worse. Last winter I tried every medicated shampoo I could find and I still had raw spots on my scalp.
Raw spots from scratching.
I have colored my hair since I was 13 (only about 2 years total since that I have been my "natural" color). Coloring my hair was horribly painful but it did seem to help my scalp be less itchy.
Seriously, the horrible chemicals in hair color solution would improve my scalp.
Last January, I realized that part of it is gluten-related. I am not sure if going to Burger King and having a burger and onion rings would cause my scalp to break out - mostly because I don't want to deal with all the other side effects to just test it out. Each time I spend about a week eating out of kitchens that are not gluten-free, my scalp breaks out. It did seem to heal faster with the castille soap, so I kept using it.
Even though it stinks.
To add to the fun, I learned that with hard water, castille soap can cause a build up that makes the hair look oily.
The same day it is washed.
The treatment for that is simple, just a vinegar rinse.
So tea-tree oil castille soap (which stinks) followed by vinegar (which also stinks).
My wet hair does not smell lovely. Or floral. Or appealing.
While I do use apple cider vinegar, which does smell better than distilled white vinegar, it still stinks.
This week I decided to see if I could use normal shampoo (because I wanted to see if I might could do pretty smelling hair.
The first time went well, no problems. My hair felt wonderful.
So I tried it again. Everything seemed fine until about 3 hours after washing my hair when I realized my scalp felt somewhat painful. I couldn't figure out why but it just kept getting more and more painful as I thought about it. Then I remembered the shampoo. By the time I got to the shower, I couldn't wait for the water to get hot.
Luckily, washing off the remaining shampoo seemed to mostly do the job.
It is still a little tender.
So now I can make Sally Albright look low-maintenance.