Hello again

Well I took an unintended hiatus for a bunch of little reasons, most really inconsequential but some of them worth a blogging break. I have written posts in my head that never quite made it past my fingers and I have been where I couldn't even think about doing any posts.

Part of it is that God and I have been dealing with some issues that I think are now mostly resolved. I think.

Then there was also gearing up for Food and Nutrition contest with both kids competing for real. (The posts on that are here and here).

I have been cooking more again and enjoying it. I did a wonderful roast chicken tonight that looked so good my husband asked where I got it. He was surprised that I roasted it so well the first time I tried it.

I am also trying to figure out what exactly to do with these blogs. Part of me says to combine them, since some things (like the contest posts) I would like to have here even though they seem to fit more with the cooking. The other part says to keep it separate because I don't know how many of you would be interested in gluten-free cooking or why I measure with a scale now or whatever. I would love to hear your thoughts on the matter.

I think I should be posting more now that I have worked through some things with God (I may share more on that latter, just not ready to right now).

Book Review - Bonhoeffer

Dietrich Bonhoeffer lived in Germany during some of the most fascinating and horrifying times of its history. Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy by Eric Metaxes tells his story and is an excellent book on many different levels.

In case you didn't know, Dietrich Bonhoeffer was born in 1906, the youngest son of a very intellectual German family. Dietrich decided at a fairly young age to study theology and then later became a pastor and trained pastors. As the Hilter came into power and started to corrupt the German church, Bonhoeffer tried to enable the church to resist and ended up helping form the Confessing Church. Later he would take part in the German resistance and was in on the plot to assassinate Hitler. For his part in the resistance movement he was arrested and then executed for knowing of the assassination plot 2 weeks before US military reached the concentration camp where he was being held.

I understand Hitler's Germany so much more. The German resistance movement is not mentioned in many school history books beyond the sentence or two mentioning the attempt that was foiled by a heavy table. I learned more of the horror that surrounded Hitler's rule although I am sure much more was left out than was actually included. It was sad though to keep reading of friends and family of Bonhoeffer that would die in WWII - nevermind that most of them wouldn't be alive now.

What I read of Bonhoeffer's theology has me wanting to read more, not just Bonhoeffer but also Karl Barth. In my opinion, it is a good book that makes you want to learn more instead of one that leaves you satisfied with limited knowledge.

All in all, I enjoyed this book. It is long (542 pages not including the notes or index) but it is very inspiring and thought provoking. Let me put it this way, my husband was shocked to see me use a highlighter in the book because I don't write in books. I rarely find enough to underline to make it worth defacing the book. I underlined a lot in this book.

One of my favorite quotes is:

First of all I will confess quite simply -- I believe that the Bible alone is the answer to all our questions, and that we only need to ask repeatedly and a little humbly, in order to receive this answer. One cannot simply read the Bible, like other books. One must be prepared really to enquire of it. Only thus will it reveal itself. Only if we expect from it the ultimate answer, shall we receive it. This is because in the Bible God speaks to us. And one cannot simply think about God in one's own strenght, one has to enquire of him. Only if we seek him, will he answer us. Of course it is also possible to read the Bible like any other book, that to say from the point of view of textual criticism. etc; there is nothing to be said against that. Only that that is not the method which will reveal to us the heart of the Bible, but only the surface, just as we do not grasp the words of someone we love by taking them to bits, but simply by receiving them, so that for days they go on lingering in our minds, simply because they are the words of someone we love, and just as these words reveal more and more of the person who said them as we go on, like Mary "pondering them in our heart," so will it be with the words of the Bible.Only if we venture to enter into the words of the Bible, as though in them this God were speaking to us who loves us and does not will to leave us along with our questions, only so shall we learn to rejoice in the Bible. - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

This book was provided for purpose of review by Thomas Nelson but any opinions are mine. 

my baby girl is gone far far away

My baby girl is somewhere between 533 - 800 miles away from me. In another state.

Somehow she managed to grow up enough to go with our church's youth group off to camp. So she is either on the road or at camp. 800 miles away. Which is roughly 1300 kilometers (because sometimes metric just sounds so much worse.)

Hubby pointed out that she is with people we trust and God is watching over her. I would still much rather it not be 800 miles away. Or 1287 kilometers.



The other side of it is that I have been to that camp, it was my first youth camp. It was only 400 miles from my home in west Texas and so as far as I know, that church still goes to the same camp every year.

Hubby has only been in New Mexico twice and that is the north east corner to drive through yet he is not being as big of a worrywart as I am. Or maybe he is hiding it better.



I am also wishing I was along. I lived in Midland (which is almost spitting distance into New Mexico )until I was a teen. My grandparents lived in New Mexico and I still cousins and an aunt out there.

So it is like she is getting to go to my old home without me.




I said it was my first youth camp, but it was also my first camp of any kind (other than day camps). I didn't want to go. My mother didn't really want me to go. My dad insisted. I was am painfully shy but I actually made friends with some of the people in my youth group. The second year I was eager to go.




It wasn't just friendships though, it was how the camp discipled me. I was a christian in that I had prayed the prayer, gotten baptised, etc but I hadn't really started developing that personal relationship with Christ until that point. I may have heard about it before but that is about all.

If she is as oblivious as I was, I hope she has an awakening. Either way, I know she will learn so much.




But still - my baby girl is 800 miles away (or on her way to being 800 miles away).

my favorite app

Do you have a smart phone? i have a BlackBerry Torch which I loved until about 2 months ago and am now drooling over the Android phones. Not that it matters. Blackberry was my first smartphone and I thought I would love it forever but then I started hearing about some of the droid capabilities and . . . . I guess I am fickle.

But my favorite app works on a BlackBerry and Droid (as well as that other phone producer. You know which one I am talking about).

YouVersion.com is a website that has the Bible online for free. And not just one or two translations - 41 translations in 22 languages. They also have reading plans, for example 18 different plans for reading through the whole Bible. Most of those are reading through the Bible in a year, some you read the new testament more than once, some chronological, some in the order they were written, one for reading the Bible in 90 days.

The nice thing is that it keeps track for you. There is no need to find the list that tells you which verses are today's reading, it knows that you missed last Wednesdays reading so you can catch up on Saturday.

There is also the ability to bookmark verses and make notes as you are reading. Not to mention a pretty awesome search function.

And all of this is available on the phone app and more things that I haven't explored.

And now there is the ability to have the phone app read the Bible to you. Now this is not available in all translations (or probably all languages) but I think that it is a cool function.

What they haven't been able to do is reproduce the feel of a Bible in your hands.

I still love the weight of my study Bible. I love turning the onion skin pages. I get so much out of the notes I have written in the margin, the verses I have highlighted over the years.

But I can't carry that Bible in my pocket. It isn't convenient to pull it out while waiting in line at the grocery store. For that I love YouVersion.

I have not been asked by YouVersion to give this review. I have received the app for free because it is free for everyone. I am not getting any special benefit or kickback or anything. I just love the app.

Bible in 90 days

Last year I tried to do the Bible in 90 days challenge but I didn't finish.

I didn't get very far at all.

This year I was determined to do better.

And I did!

I finished in 88 days.

Considering how many days I had to read 2 or 3 days worth, I probably could have read it in 60 days but we won't even go there.

I loved doing Bible in 90 days because it gave me a broad overview of the whole Bible. I think a good comparison would be if you had a painting by a master (Renoir, Van Gough, Matisse) and only looked at it with a magnifying glass. You might know exactly how he painted that ear or eye or flower but never know the painting was of a girl, a man or a field of flowers. Sometimes you have to step back to see the whole picture.

I still think Bible Study is incredibly important but I think you can get a lot from an overview. It's true you can't read in depth when you are reading so much at a time but there is still value in reading through all the events, not just the ones that are easy to read.

Would I do it again? Yes, definately! I am planning on participating again in July when it happens again.

In the meantime, I plan on studying more about the Gospels also with Amy at Mom's Toolbox.

3 in 30 January check up

How am I doing?
Well . . .

• On reading the Bible every day, I am actually doing well. I have read some every day and I am a bit ahead on the Bible in 90 days challenge. I like to stay one day ahead so that I am not behind if I am not able to do a full days worth one day. Honestly though, I am really enjoying it, and learning from it. Since it was only a few days before that I read where the Edomites came from (for example) I remember the connection when the Edomites don't let the Israelites pass through their land.
• Keeping a food journal: I stink at this. Seriously. I journaled one day. Really I need to figure out some app for the Blackberry that makes it easy because I always have my phone with me.
• On cooking more real meals: I did! I cooked a healthy, balanced, delicious meal for every day of the week. And then I woke up. So really not so much. I did do 3 meals with a TON of left-overs. We had homemade tomato soup (full of veggies) with grilled cheese sandwich (homemade bread), PW's Chicken Tortilla Soup (except it was more like a casserole because I didn't add the water. Because I doubled it. And my pot was too small. seriously), and homemade chili (which needs a bunch of work to taste right since there was no mix involved.)
  
  As a side note, I think it should be required by law to state if the serves 8 is 8-that-are-also-eating-Thanksgiving-dinner or 8-that-haven't-eaten-all-day-long-and-this-is-all-you-are-cooking. Because it really makes a difference.
  
  As another side note, we like chicken tortilla casserole.

So I guess I did halfway in all :-/

Next month I will challenge myself to breathe every day, eat every day, and brush my teeth every day.

The end.

A new challenge

I don't know about you but I am not huge on New Year being a big new start. After all, I still weigh pretty much the same as I did last week, bank account is still about the same, kids haven't turned into perfect angels. Everything is pretty much the same except I have to correct myself every time I write the date (I will finally get used to writing 2011 about April or May).

On the other hand, January does seem to be a good time to challenge myself and I do have some goals I want to practice. Did you know it takes 21 days to make a (good) habit? So if you start now, by the end of January you can have a new habit.

With that in mind I have decided to do 3 in 30. Meghan Tucker and some others decided to break all these goals down into manageable pieces by tackling 3 a month. That's all. No 20 page lists of self improvement goals. Just 3.

Then next month 3 more.

See it doesn't sound too hard does it.

So what are my goals for January? Mostly things I have been needing to do for a long time.

1. Read the Bible everyday Last year I signed up to to the Bible in 90 days and I wasn't able to finish. This time I will. If you want more information about this years reading challenge (its not too late, it only started January 3rd) you can go here
2. Cook more meals I mean real meals not just a quick throw together of omelets or mac and cheese. I need to increase how many veggies we eat too. I am not saying I can do it for every dinner but I would like to cook 5 healthy main meals a week. (ok, I would rather have a genie or fairy that would do the cooking for me, but we all know that won't happen.)
3. Keep a food journal Being gluten free has helped me tremendously, fewer headaches, less joint paint, better digestion, clearer thinking. I know suspect that there might be something else that bothers me. I do still have headaches and more frequent than I would like. I am hoping a food journal will help point to whatever else I need to remove from my diet.

And that is the gist of it. Do you want to take the challenge too?

When is forgiveness not forgivness

There is someone who has recently started going back to our church that I . . . I just really don't like her.

Or maybe I haven't forgiven her for how my daughter was treated. She led a small division of a kids group (I am trying to vague so I don't gossip - or at least limit the gossip). It was her duty to come up with learning activities for the kids - you know crafts and things like that. During the instruction she spent a fair amount of time discussing her ex-husband, her current boy-friend then ex-boyfriend, new boyfriend then suddenly new husband. She would cancel meetings and we wouldn't find out until no one showed up. But the final straw was the results of the fund-raiser. The kids would sell items for the fund-raiser and then with the proceeds do something fun like a trip to 6 Flags and The Aquarium during the summer. Well, Daisy worked hard and asked everyone she knew, she was also at the booths where the kids would sell to people going in the store. In addition, her dad took the sales sheet to work and sold a bunch. When the totals came in, Daisy had sold close to half of the groups total. Then there was a planning meeting to discuss when this trip would be made, we all said when we could not make it and a weekend was planned for. Then they had another unannounced meeting and planned the trip for one of the two weekends out of the summer that we were unable to attend.

Daisy was extremely upset but she really wanted to go on the major family vacation that was planned a year prior so she didn't fuss too much.

They gave a consolation prize from the group for not being able to go - a $25 gift card to build-a-bear that she would have also gotten if she had gone.

The next year we joined 4-H instead.

I thought I had forgiven in the passing years but I am not sure now that I am seeing her 2-3 times a week. I just have no use for her, she may have changed but I don't care to find out. Luckily our church is big enough that I probably won't have to talk to her.

It still leaves me wondering, can you forgive someone and then not like the person anymore or is that still unforgiveness?

waterworks

Today we went to the waterpark with a little boy in Junior's Sunday school class. The boys ran and played and ran some more - I don't know who had more fun, the kids or the adults watching them. While the kids played, the grownups talked about a variety of subjects -purple hull peas, canning, where C's sister was.

Junior enjoys playing with C because they are so much alike, 110% boy and Junior had mentioned that they hadn't been going to church as much lately. I got the idea (or God gave me the idea) that C needed a normal playdate - just for a few hours to be a normal little boy and not be a little boy who's little sister is dieing.

Honestly, I didn't realize how bad it was. I knew she has leukemia and that it has come back, I know that it means hours in doctor offices and hospitals and I know you can't give equal amounts of attention when one child needs so much.

On the way home, I mentioned to Hubby that I didn't realize how bad it was. Daisy asked later how bad it was and then sobbed for the family when I told her.

Cadence is 4 years old and has leukemia. The doctors have said that she can't have anymore chemo. All they can do is give her some of her daddy's T cells but that isn't going to cure her (or that is my understanding).

Please pray for Cadence and her family. This is so hard on all of them.

Right now

I am doing better. The tears still flow fairly frequently but they aren’t quite as close to the surface. I am feeling so grateful for so many things.

 

• I am grateful for having such a good Daddy – although it does make it harder that he is gone.
• I am grateful for the fond memories my kids will have of him.
• I am grateful for the little miracles that kept him healthy – his first oncologist basically said to wait at home to die,  the second gave him another 4 years of living.
• I am grateful for feeling closer to God rather than anger at Him.
• I am grateful for my family and friends who have prayed for us during this time.
• I am thankful that I could celebrate my Daddy going home even if I wish he could have waited longer.

The saying goes “the devil is in the details” but it is also so true that God is in the details.  There are so many little details that God took care of as a reminder that He is there.

 

I don’t know why my dad had to get cancer. I don’t know why it had to be an aggressive cancer. But I do know that God is in control, that He will work it for good somehow. I know that right now He has my hand and he won’t let go.

And for my Dad, I love these verses:

I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.
Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.                2 Timothy 4:7 & 8

I cry in church

I am very, very blessed in my church home. It feels like home, it is comfortable and safe there. I try not to cry in front of my kids but they are frequently busy somewhere else at church or they are busy singing along with the music.

 

It is partly the music’s fault. As I sing How Great is Our God my heart and head are praising God for his greatness – even when things are dark. I am reminded that even in the midst of sorrow God is there, His hand is there.

 

His hand shows up in little ways, “coincidences”  that He engineers. Reminders that He is there and cares. Friday someone sent me a message on Facebook, something seemingly random but I am convinced that God had a hand in it. She probably didn’t really know what was going on when she sent me the message.

 

It is these sort of things that I remember when singing praise songs or hymns. It is when I am praising Him that I most feel like I am curled up in my Abba Daddy’s lap and can’t help but have tears stream down my cheeks.

 

On those days that I am feeling emotionally bruised, I grab a few kleenexes and keep them ready to dab the tears out of my eyes. Because I will probably end up crying in church.

A new challenge for a new year

About 3 B.C. it was a simpler time. There wasn't all the clamoring noise that there is now and I could more easily accomplish what I wanted to do.

That is 3 years Before Children - so about 13 years ago. Anyway, I made a challenge to myself of reading the Bible in a year. And I did it. But some of those brain cells have since died and I need to reread it.

So I am going to take the 90 day challenge. Yep, I am going to try to read through the Bible in 90 days.

Seriously, if I can read the Twilight series in less than a week, I should be able to read the Bible in 90 days.

Is it going to be easy? No, but rarely is there very much value in the easy stuff. The blessings that I am going to get from this are going to be huge - no, I am not talking about prosperity gospel. I am talking about the blessing of getting to know my precious Savior better.

So do you want to join us? There is a group of us taking the 90 Day Challenge through Mom's Toolbox.

Amy from Mom's Toolbox says:

A few years ago I read through the Bible, cover to cover, in 90 days… Yes, the whole thing. (Okay, I’ll admit it. My first pass took 97 days, but I’ve done it in 90, and helped many others do it in 90, since then!)

And now I want to help even more people read it in 90 days… because it really did change my life.

So now I’m inviting you to join me, as I attempt to lead my first online community of readers and we blog thru the Bible in 90 days, January 1, 2010 – March 31, 2010.

I’ll post my (almost) daily observations about the reading at least 5 days a week and host Twitter parties each Monday night of the program so we can talk about the reading together.

I’d love to have you join me in this adventure.

I’m not going to mislead you, this is a terrifically challenging task. At minimum, you’ll need to get your hands on the official Bible in 90 Days Bible ($14.99 at Biblein90Days.org) and plan to read 12 pages a day, 84 pages a week for 90 days straight. (That’s about an hour of reading every single day, but the print is nice and large and the footnotes are minimal…. I’ll explain more later as to why this specific Bible will help you achieve this goal. But let me be clear that this is an NIV Thinline Bible. No content added (except a reading schedule), nothing taken away. We will be reading every word of the NIV Bible straight through, from Genesis to Revelation.

I’ll be here every step of the way, cheering you on and praying for you, too. But that’s not all, a few other blogger buddies will also be cheering you on as we build our reading community and dive into this adventure together.

So are you in?

Burdens and lightening the load

The other day we were watched Little House on the Prairie, the miniseries movie based on book 2 of the series. We had read part of the series several years ago and thought that this would be something that we could watch with the kids without having to pre-screen - and it was fine.

There is one scene that got me thinking though, and it is a scene mentioned in many of the books and movies about going west. People would leave home with only the "necessary" provisions and then find that if they were going to make it, they would have to lighten the load. So out on the side of the road they would leave great-grandma's table, aunt Tilly's trunk, pappy's books. These things so precious became a burden that was slowing them down. And maybe they weren't even things that were loved, but things that they felt they "ought" to keep.

Either way, they became burdens.

It struck me how often we do that now, carry burdens that are weighing us down - a feeling of guilt from something that happened in high school, worry over something we can't change, hurt feelings from a family member. All burdens that we carry and have no idea how to get rid of.

Sometimes we get rid of them only to find out we have picked them up again.

Sometimes we feel that we need to keep shouldering that burden.

Sometimes we don't know it is there.

Sometimes it seems the hardest thing to do is to toss the burden at His feet. Many times we have to lay it down over and over.

But it is worth it. It is worth the pain and fear of trusting. Through laying down our burdens, the way is easier.

Max Lucado's Fearless

Everyone has fears of some kind. Everyone.

There are the fears that can mostly be avoided like the fear of crowds or airplanes or needles. But then there are those fears that keep you awake at night - fears of not mattering; fears of not protecting your kids; fear of death. These are the fears that we are powerless against, they gnaw at you and they distract you from the One who can give you peace.

Max Lucado's new book is Fearless and it takes on these fears as well as others: fear of disappointing God, fear of running out, fear of overwhelming challenges, fear of worst case scenarios, fear of violence, fear of the coming winter, fear of life's final moments, fear of what's next, fear that God is not real, fear of global calamity, fear of God getting out of my box. We live in a society that is incredibly fearful and rather than depend on the One who can conquer fear, we walk around as if we have been defeated.

Here is a brief video talking about fear:


Like Max Lucado's other books, this is not a dry, weighty tome full of big, hard to understand words. Nor is it a fluff bit of work. Fearless is an engaging book written in an easy to understand language. Included in the book is a study guide that can be used with groups or by an individual.

I recommend reading through the whole book, some of the chapters I was surprised by the direction they took. I have read through the whole book, and while I can't say I enjoyed the whole thing - some of it was too close to sensitive areas - I got alot out of it. I plan on going back and taking a closer look at those sensitive areas and useing the study guide along with it.

This is a book I highly recommend to anyone. I was very glad to be able to review this book for Thomas Nelson Book Review Bloggers.

By the way - I am not getting anything from Nelson or Max Lucado other than the book to review. I am not being paid or anything like that. I just got a free book.

Of random particles and souls

Years ago I worked at the local hospital and while it was hard work, I enjoyed it. Well, I enjoyed it as much as I could given an extreme fear of needles. No I wasn't a nurse but a nurse aid (I would take blood pressure, temperature, run food trays, run errands for the nurses).

I have some funny stories from there - as well as from before when I worked at a nursing home. There are also some sad stories, some heartbreaking things.

One elderly man that I will always remember because of what I saw. I couldn't really give you a description of him other than tall and thin, I don't remember his name or why he was there. He fell while in the hospital and so an x-ray was ordered to see if he had broken his hip.

I was helping the x-ray tech with the portable x-ray and was watching the patients face during the actual x-ray. All of a sudden he was not there.

He was still breathing, his eyes were still open, his pulse was normal but some change had gone over his face. I couldn't describe it then and I still can't say what it was now.

After the x-ray tech left, I went and spoke to the nurse. I told her that his vitals were ok, but I had seen something happen and I didn't know what it was. She immediately went to check on him and while she was in there, he coded.

He died that night. I believe that he died peacefully - when his soul slipped away - when he wasn't there. The CPR that followed battered his body, but he was gone.

He is one of the reasons I can't fathom the random particle evolution theory. He had a soul - random particles don't have a soul. Atheists think that only the simpleminded believe in intelligent design. I think they are unobservant.

The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands. Psalms 19:1

The prayer of a child

Yesterday, Junior asked if I felt better and if my teeth still hurt. When I complained that yes they did, his face fell.

"I prayed that God would make you feel better and make your teeth stop hurting. I guess He said no."

Oh my! My baby boy prayed for me! That did me some good.

So I told him that God always answers prayers, sometimes He says yes, sometimes no and sometimes not yet. He looked a little confused so I went on, "It's like when you ask for candy, sometimes I say yes. If it is before lunchtime, I say not yet - you have to eat lunch first. If you just had some sugary treat then I say no." His face cleared as he understood what I was saying and felt better.

This morning he asked how I was doing and I was able to tell him I was feeling better, which was good because he had prayed again last night.

Who do you worship?

In church we are studying the book of Daniel which is one of my favorite books in the Bible. This is the book where Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego were thrown in the furnace lit 7 times hotter than normal. This is also the book where Daniel was thrown in the lions den. This is the book where a disembodied hand writes on the wall pronouncing judgment over a king.

Even though it is my favorite book, I am still learning from it - I love how God can do that! You know, show you something new each time.

To set this up, I need to give you a very, very condensed version of one of the stories.

So in Daniel 2, King Nebuchadnezzer has a dream that he wants interpreted because he can't sleep, but he doesn't want to tell what the dream is. Daniel and his friends pray and God tells Daniel about the dream and what it means. Daniel then tells the king what his dream is and what it means. The king is mighty impressed and makes Daniel a VIP.

Here is something I never noticed, Daniel 2:46 "Then King Nebuchadnezzer threw himself down before Daniel and worshiped him." Daniel had given all the credit to God but Nebuchadnezzer worshiped Daniel.

So we were discussing this in our class and someone mentioned how stupid Nebuchadnezzer was to worship the wrong one. Instead of worshiping the Most High God, he worships the messenger. But he wasn't the only one who did this.

It is human nature! We want someone with skin or something we can see to worship. For example, when Moses died, he was buried by God (or the angels) so that no one could worship him. You might think that is a bit extreme but if you consider all the "holy relics" of the middle ages - splinters off the cross, etc - you might realize that it probably would have happened.

And what about today? We aren't really any better. A popular pastor says something that is contrary to God's word and we would prefer to believe the pastor. Or almost as bad, we never look to see if he is correct.

Is that not a form of worship? The only infallible human to have ever walked the earth was Jesus, the rest of us - pastors and priests included - mess up daily.

Please read the Bible for yourself, double check what you are being taught.

I am very blessed to have a pastor that is very open to correction. If you can show him in the Bible where he is wrong, he admits it. He says he is only right 80-90% of the time, and that it is our job to figure out where he is wrong.

Some are not like that, they want to be who you trust. They remind me of the abusive spouse/boyfriend, the first thing they do is isolate you from what can tell you the truth.

If you are told that you are too stupid to read and understand God's word, you have been lied to.

If you have been told to blindly trust your preacher because they know God's word better, you are being told to worship a man.

Unfortunately, it is much easier to worship a man, especially when he is saying what you want to hear.

For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. They will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths. (2 Timothy 4:3-4 New International Version)

Who do you worship? The one true living God who made the heavens and the earth or someone who is a fallible human.

Dayenu

I realized that I didn't say how the actual Seder went and I will in a different post, but first I wanted to talk about Dayenu.

Dayenu is a Hebrew word that means "it would have been enough," and is one of the songs sung at Passover.

The words to the version we sang in English are:

If you had just brought us out of Egypt, it would have been enough.
If you had only given us the Sabbath, it would have been enough.
If you had only given us the Torah, it would have been enough.
If you had only given us Messiah, it would have been enough.

I would imagine the ancient Hebrews just wanted to stop being slaves and go home to their father's land but God had so much more planned for them. There is a longer version here at Wikipedia that also mentions much more such as being given the Egyptians wealth, the sea being divided, providing manna, and building the Temple.

God still allows His blessings to overflow on us. If you had only saved us from hell and not wanted anything from us, it would have been enough.
If you had only wanted our worship and not wanted a relationship, it would have been enough.
If you had just wanted a relationship with us and not wanted us to be your children, it would have been enough."

Yet how often do we respond like children? If you feed children a meal, it is enough. If you give them cupcakes with sprinkles, it should be enough but someone will complain because someone else got more sprinkles.

"God, I like having a roof over my head but I want it to be bigger like the Jones." "God, I like my kid but I want him on the honor roll like Mary's kid."

We I need to make a more conscious effort to notice thank Him for the blessings we are given.

Dayenu.

Sunday Seder

Our church (along with 2 others) was so extremely blessed to have some of the people from Congregation Beth Messiah in Houston come to let us experience a traditional Passover Seder.

Oh, it was amazing. I could go on and on but I will try to contain myself to just a few things.

First, in case you didn't know the Seder is one of the feasts commanded by God in Leviticus. It is to remind them of how God freed them from slavery to Egypt and how the angel of death passed over their homes in the last plague. In Leviticus it is called the "feast of the unleavened bread." It is also the meal that Jesus and the disciples were eating at the last supper.

That first Passover, they were commanded to bake bread with out any leavening and roast a lamb. The leavening is a symbol of sin, but it also shows that they were not supposed to take their time. Bread with leavening takes awhile and they had to be ready to leave.

Now the Jews that celebrate Passover are supposed to rid their house of leavening. This is not just the jar of yeast in the freezer, but any bread, and anything that might have bread crumbs (like a toaster.) The point is though, we can't remove every bit of it any more than we can remove every bit of sin. That's why we need Jesus.

At the Seder meal there is a plate filled with Karpas (greens), Betzah (egg), Maror (bitter herbs), & Charoset (Nuts & Fruit). I am not going to attempt to give an explanation because you will find many on the net that will be much better than mine.

But there is something I want to share about the Karpas. We had parsley for our greens and the green symbolizes life. Passover happens in the spring when new life starts up. Life is given and sustained by God.

Before eating the Parsley, we were told to dip it in some salt water which symbolizes the tears that were shed by Israel as well as the tears that we shed. The Maror symbolizes the bitterness in slavery, but I also see it in the tears.

Tears shed because of slavery. I also know that we are not immune to slavery. So many are enslaved by their sin - powerless to stop. And then so many exchange those bonds for a new set of bonds. Any religion that wants you to jump through hoops to assure you that you are saved - for the moment at least - is not what He planned. If you have to do A, B and C in order to be saved, then you are saying that His sacrifice is not enough.

Ok, I am getting off of my soapbox now.

The Seder is so rich in symbolism that points straight to Christ as the Messiah. There are three pieces of unleavened bread together in a pocket, the middle one is broken and then wrapped in linen and hidden to be found later. "He took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is My body which is given for you; do this in remembrance of Me." Luke 22:19.

I have so much more to share, but I am going to stop here for now. I want to tell you about Dayenu - it would have been enough. What a deep and rich word! But that will be tomorrow.

He's got my hand

Have you ever walked with a toddler, somewhere that they needed a hand holding them.

And they fall.

They always fall.

They are hanging there by the hand that you are gripping so tightly it has to hurt. It has to be scary for them.

Not being sure if they are going to be dropped.

Sometimes they spin around, sometimes they still get scraped up. Undoubtedly though, they would have been hurt worse without your hand.

Would you let them go, to fall to the ground?

Of course not!

That is how I see God's grip. Even in trying times, horrible difficulties, He has got our hand.

The world may be spinning, but He has got us in His hand.

We may be scraped up, but we would have been hurt more if we didn't have His hand.

This isn't to say that life as a christian is easy. There are the same stressors - cancer, failed marriage, job loss - but we still have His hand.

Sometimes He walks with us into places we don't really want to go, things that stretch us and grow us. But He still has our hand.

He won't let go.